Do you have the ingredients for a happy life?

Ingredients for a good life

If you’re missing an important ingredient to live a fulfilling life, pick that one and make the most of it. If you can’t pick just one, then take all the ones you need. They are all good reasons to live a wonderful and good life.
Important is that first you accept yourself the way you are, because you’re the recipe for the ingredients. And together you are life, the happy life you want to live.
Ingredients for a good life

I carry your heart with me.

You have my heart . jpg

This morning I wrote a poem for my Mom because I wanted to give her something today, something special, words, on this day that she’ll bring her Beloved brother and my Dearest Uncle to his last resting place.
When I started writing I remembered a few words from a few poems I read yesterday, just like my Uncle would say, that his heart is ours. I decided to use those words ’cause that’s what I wanted her to remember about him.

I know it’s part of life. I know it is, everybody knows that! But still, everytime we lose a loved one, every time we see someone we love in sorrow, it hurts.
But we need to remember that we’re never alone. Our loved ones that left us, are in our hearts, they are at our side. We need to accept that God wants it to be that way.

Forgive me that my post has a lot of sadness in it this time, I hope you see the positive part of it and thank you very much for reading.

 

The less you expect, the less disappointed you’ll be.

The less you expect, the less disappointed  you will be

Usually when we give away kindness, we get it back. The reason why we for example smile to other people is because it feels good and it even makes others happy. But it should only be done without any expectations. If someone doesn’t smile back to us we shouldn’t be disappointed. In this beautiful world unfortunately we don’t only have people with good hearts. I’m not saying that someone who doesn’t treat us with respect is a bad person. There are among us lots of people that don’t even realize they sometimes hurt us just because they talk or act without using their mind. Some of them are good people, they just haven’t had the opportunity to learn to take others opinion into consideration. Others are not being honest and they abuse our trust, but for us it’s to remain honest and knowing that we did good. That empowers us to stay the good persons we are. Knowing that, makes us strong and gives us back that smile on our faces that we tend to lose sometimes.

Of course it’s impossible to say that one will never ever be disappointed if one starts expecting less. There are moments that we’ll be disappointed anyway. Unfortunately those moments do exist. 
I lost my best friend many years ago. After she passed away, during the first years, I didn`t know how to deal with the fact that I had the idea that God let her and me down. I really expected her to get better and she herself was also convinced it would happen. But suddenly she was gone! It took a long time before I understood that I shouldn’t have blamed God. I was so convinced and I prayed and begged but also expected that He would make sure she would get better. She didn’t, so I felt this deep disappointment. It would have been wiser if I would have been more realistic and prepared myself for the possibility of the big disappointment I could encounter. 
But on the other hand, a few years ago I almost lost my Mom and all I did was hoping and asking Him for help. No expectations at all, just gratefulness for the moments spent together with her, and what was the result? She got better! So you see, one can get happiness also without having any expectations, but by being positive, very positive! Positivism brings happiness in our lives. 
As long as we live we have to enjoy our lives and we shouldn`t focus on bad things and people that let us down or disappoints us. 
Within the years I learned a lot, I felt many times, stood up again and started expecting less from people. After my best friend passed away I was giving a lot of trust to some of my other friends and doing everything they wished me to do even if I didn’t really like it. Seeing others satisfied made me also happy, at least, that’s what I thought at that time.
I wasn’t complaining about anything, in fact, I was accepting everything! If I would give an idea and it would be ignored, I wouldn’t start a discussing ’cause I wouldn’t wanted ruin the good ambiance and as I was learned to be thankful with what I have, I was able to accept fast. I was living up their expectations. But, in the meanwhile in my heart I wished sometimes that the day would come for them to give me an act of kindness back. Then, one day I realized I was wishing for something that can not be and that I could never be really happy if I kept thinking and hoping for people to treat me the same way as I was treating them. Probably I was expecting my closest friends unconsciously to be like my best friend, which was impossible! At that point I opened my eyes. I was lucky to have known this special person that looked like me, thought the same way I did and loved things I loved. But not everybody is the same. So, from that moment on I stopped expecting unrealistic things to happen and I started seeing the differences in people and learned that everybody is different. Choosing for myself was the biggest and the toughest change. No expectations but only honesty and facing that suddenly the same people couldn`t bear that I was being the real me. So I lost many people around me, but real ones stayed. One is fairer than another, one kinder than another, some living in their own world without “giving something back when they always get from others” in a natural way but I choose to see the good in them and not to expect too much and that made my life easier and nicer.
Once in a while when you forget not to expect too much and when this thing in life called disappointment reaches you and you get off track, react on time and see it as another lesson learned. A little scar might be left behind, but consider that scar as a proof of what you’ve learned. 
Nowadays, the area where I encounter disappointments frequently is respect. I’ll never understand why it’s difficult for some people to naturally respect their fellows, but I have accepted that it’s part of life. Since I started expecting less, I noticed I get more positive surprises coming my way.  
Precisely at moments you don’t expect anything, joy and success comes easily. They won’t only make you happy but also stronger and they’ll make you understand things better and see the value of things and people in life.
 
Quote by Bruce Lee

Give love everyday!

Give Love Everyday
There are so many ways of spreading love and happiness to our loved ones. While I’m writing this post, I see that there are only a few minutes left and then we’ll have to wait for another year for this day called Valentine’s Day to come again. 

Thinking back of the messages and calls I got today, from which some really surprised me, I got the affirmation that I need to admit that there is something very special about this day. 
Today during a conversation regarding Valentine’s Day, I mentioned like I always do “I think that everyday should be Valentine’s day. So why would I wish a special day to be there if every day can be special?” I think I got punished because during the day I got overwhelmed with wonderful messages, more than I was used to get. My busy aunt from Italy sent me this beautiful card and special message and later on after we talked to each other, I only felt more blessed to have her as my aunt. My brother in Spain also knew a good way to surprise me…and so on. 
  
The good thing about love is that it has this “bounce back” effect, so you’ll get love back in return. If it’s not meant to be, then of course it won’t work but then it’s not real love and this post is about real love.  
A hug, a few words of love, remembering the first kiss, those kind of things can fill one’s heart with so much love, that it will last longer than you could imagine. 
So, my conclusion is that on Valentine’s Day, lots of extra love have been shared! And after this special day is gone, love will still be spread every other day as if it’s everyday Valentine’s day. 🙂

 

Be thankful for today and everyday.

WPROSE
Last weekend I had a wonderful time with my family. When I got back home on Sunday, I simply started thinking about all the things I was thankful for. I don’t post much on Facebook, but this time I really I wanted to share this thought of appreciation with everybody I know on there. So, I placed a few words of appreciation on my mom’s FB wall. I did that because I wanted her to know that (even though I’m quite sure she already knows) thanks to her I’m enriched with the feeling of gratefulness and a thankful heart.
My mom has gone through so many illnesses, operations from which we really lost the count, medical errors which costed her a few times almost her life, but she keeps smiling every day. I think every smile of her makes me every day stronger and give us more and more to be thankful for. She always tells us to be thankful ’cause at least she didn’t “leave” us. And she’s totally right!
 
Be thankful for all the moments you are given to spent with your family, your friends and everyone that’s special to you. For me spending time with my loved ones is like breathing air. I couldn’t live without them. So each time we meet again, each time we hear each other voices and each time I receive a message from them I thank God for giving me another day, another opportunity to share and enjoy life with people who really treasure me. In one day there’s so much to be thankful for. I stated a just few things to be thankful for, otherwise this might become a long never ending story. I wish you all a wonderful weekend. Enjoy all the blessings you have in your lives and all the things you have to be thankful for.

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I’m thankful for all the things that make me happy in my life. 
For my family and friends.
I’m thankful for having a Job with lovely colleagues.
I’m thankful for the people that never left me and accept me for who I am. 
For being able to smile at little things around me.
For having millions of beautiful memories inside me.
I’m thankful to have the ability to eliminate negative feelings and moving on.
And I’m very thankful to be in good health.
I’m thankful for today, cause everyday there’s a today to be thankful for. 
I’m thankful to have a place to share my thoughts. This place is called WordPress. 🙂
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Don’t let doubt take away your happiness.

Don't let doubt get the chance to make you unhappy

I wrote this post a while ago but for one reason or another, every time I saw it, I felt uncomfortable. I wanted to share my story, but I kept postponing it every time. Today I finally did, and there’s a reason why I finally could. 
This occurrence, I expected that with writing it “off” me I would feel better, that I would get rid of this incomprehension and be freed from it. The truth? I didn`t feel relieved at all after writing! Normally it always works, but this time it didn’t!  If it`s inside it won`t get out as long as you don`t do something with it, especially when it concerns someone you really love and respect for a long time. I must have forgotten about that part. Normally letting go of something relieves me and frees me but this time something was different. 
 
I never knew that doubt could bring so much pain and lots of sadness into wonderful friendships. 
When people see things that aren’t there, try to convince them and at the same time try not to go along with their negativity, especially when it concerns people you love very much and care for very much. It “guzzles” all your positive energy before you even realize that, especially when you forget about yourself. It’s like being poisoned or having your beautiful moments being stolen from you and leaving only sadness and fear behind. 
 
The day I felt better was the day I finally got a message from my friend telling me she really misses me a lot. I was glad that the feeling I had telling me to forgive her and not letting her go, was stronger than the feeling telling me to forget about her. I got the chance to face my friend and threw out what I had inside my heart contaminating my good thoughts. As strong as the respect and love I had for my friend was, as strong was the pain. It’s impossible to be prepared for the unexpected. After that day I felt free and happy again. We both did. Forgiveness was the key to my relieve.  My friend regretted she ever doubted on me and I got remembered that forgiving can free you from the bad. 
 
It`s hard to know that someone special, would doubt on anything a good friend has done and said before to that person. Sometimes people decide not to trust others in their lives. I think than they shouldn`t get too close to people in their lives `cause eventually they will be the ones hurting people that really care about them. 
And why do this? Why create pain and sadness. Why invent things that aren’t there? Why not just face the reality and enjoy the moments together and enjoy life? What do they reach by letting their minds imagine things that are not there? Especially when there`s a lot of respect, when someone only wishes the best for one another and enjoy happy moments they are given together. Afterwards they realize that they also got hurt by their own actions and sometimes it might be too late. And is it worth it? Not at all! 
 
Be careful with words you use and how you use them: Think before you speak! You could break ones heart if you don`t use your words wise. If you doubt on anything, be honest to others and communicate in a good way to avoid misunderstandings. Do this as soon as you doubt on something. Misunderstanding can brake wonderful things and bring sadness in ones life. And what will you gain at the end? Nothing! You`ll loose love, happiness, you`ll loose joy, respect and you`ll create pain and sorrow instead, while it wasn`t at all what you intended to do. 
 
Close the door of doubt foreverEnjoy all the beautiful things and wonderful people around you and don`t let negativity take control of you. People around you don`t deserve to get hurt and neither do you. 
Believe in the smile you get from people around you. Remember and trust in the words they ever spoke to you. Don`t imagine a scenario that feels dark and uncomfortable when you can`t hear or understand what people say. The pain one gets when being hurt by someone they really respect and love is so intense, so sad and very painful.  
No one allows people in their heart to be hurt and ending up in a situation where one has to explain the nonexistence, is unhealthy. So, don’t give doubt the chance to make you unhappy. Now you understand why I couldn’t post this before. This was a story that had to end with two happy hearts. I see it as a proof that you can over win your doubts as long as you keep believing.

Think with your heart.

Think with your heart
People prefer to stay in the ‘safe’ zone so they can protect themselves from getting hurt. If they only knew how beautiful it is to think with their hearts, they would wish they could reverse their life, open their heart, trust their heart and experience the peace and love they carry inside of it. 
If ones heart is closed, locked up and the key thrown away somewhere far far away, thinking with ones mind is the only thing that`s left. But still, it`s never too late to open ones heart and feel love. Everything is possible as long as you stay open to it.                                                                                                                                 
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Saying from Robert Bulwer-Lytton: “A good heart is better than all the heads in the world.” 

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And I really love this quote from Anne Frank: “Despite everything, I believe that people are really good at heart.”
foto 2 (81)-002

Listen to your body!

Listen to your body
I recently learned another lesson. To listen to both my body and my mind. When they say “Stop we need a brake!”, I should slow down and give them both some rest. In the last months I rarely did that. After my surgery I even started working sooner than I should have. Not good but sometimes when we have so many obligations, we forget about ourselves.

Of course my body and I have always been together so we know each other already for a long time and it`s not the first time this happens, but I think I`ve continuously asked too much from my body. Not only my mind and body learned something new about me, but also all the lovely people around me that were angry with me, or my son who told me he won`t be talking me with me for one day if I don`t listen and get some rest. They learned that I`m very stubborn and l kept having clashes on this topic until they were exhausted.

Afterwards the situation made me smile `cause I should admit that sometimes I forget how much people do care for me. 

I decided to take the brake my body needed. And where could be the best place to give my body some rest and relax? Where my roots are! I had a wonderful time and I`m back now in Europe but all I can think of is the time of relaxation over there. I learned my lesson and I realized that overworking and not resting is also a part an unhealthy life, but I got the best therapy ever! My roots opened my eyes and I`ll hold on to that for sure. 
So, when your body needs a brake, give it to him! There are many ways to do that. You just have to find the balance.
 

Give someone a smile!

Give someone a smile

Recently I underwent a surgery that finally took place after it was aborted on the initial date. Afterwards it was postponed again to another date because of emergencies and so it went on until I was done with the whole happening.
Although there was highly need for me to undergo the surgery I became exhausted by all the uncertainty about the date, the different people that treated me and all the complicated medical questions I had to answer. At one point I had no more sense to undergo the surgery, only thinking about it made me very nervous and grumpy.
So finally the big day came! As soon as I went through the door of the hospital I was received with a smile by an assistant. I felt my anxiety level dropping down. And than again another smile followed and another one… and suddenly it was all gone! I was relaxed!! I felt like a little girl in a candy store. Well, a candy story full of needles but o.k. even that I did survive on that day thanks to all those beautiful people that treated me so well. 
I felt like I got lot`s of gifts on that day. Gifts in the shape of real smiles. And whenever someone asks me about my surgical experience on that day, the biggest part of my conversation is about how friendly they were to me. 
And I`m grateful that in spite of the position I was in, I got the opportunity to feel happiness in a moment like that, thanks to the smiles I received in that clinic. 
“A little smile can really make a big difference.”

A “no worries” attitude.

no worries

What we do in the present shapes our future. Our past is the key to our present but also the key to our future. If you live in the present your life will be balanced and healthy.
Too many times we give our minds the chance to focus and worry about negativeness, instead of accepting that what has happened cannot be changed and focusing on the present. 
A life free of worries is about accepting life like it is and being optimistic. A life free of worries is about accepting all what happened in the past, living and enjoying every moment in the present. If you can have that “don`t worry too much” attitude your life can be more optimistic and happier.

Don`t worry

“The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, not to worry about the future, or not to anticipate troubles, but to live in the present moment wisely and earnestly.” Buddha